Wednesday, October 31, 2007

A poem that reminds me of Dad

Miss you Daddy!

As Death Approaches

I can't believe I'm laughing!
I'd have sworn I'd be
shaking or sniveling.
And I sure didn't expect
a limousine.
I've never been in a limousine.
No biggy.
I've had better than fame.
Who needs the pressure?
As for fortune, I'm filthy.
That's why I'm laughing.
I've had so much love:
the giving, the getting.
It's shameful.
It's embarrassing.
And it's too late.
No one can take it away!
And I've had the pain
to help me appreciate it.
Thank God for the pain!
Easy for me to say
now that I'm going!
But no, seriously,
the kicks in the teeth,
the gut, the rugs
pulled out, slammed doors,
setbacks, snubs.
Without them, I'd
never have recognized
Love, bedraggled,
plain eyes shining,
happy to see me.
Do I want more?
Of course I want more!
I always want more
of everything: money, hugs,
lovemaking, art, butter,
woods, flowers, the sea,
M&Ms, chips, tops, bottoms,
trips — I did give up drinking —
time, sure, and yes,
I'd like to see
my grandchildren,
if there are any.
I'd like to see my books
but more has never
been good for me anyway.
Enough — that's what I've
always needed to learn,
and is there a better way?
So this laughter
I had to work up to
through so many tears,
it just keeps coming
like a fountain, a spray.
Let it light on you
refreshment, benediction,
as I'm driven away.

Susan Deborah King, from One-Breasted Woman. © Holy Cow! Press, 2007


Buy the book!

Thursday, June 28, 2007

A Note from Carolyn Mason in Seaside


I often think of his harrowing experience up here on the hill, when the boat trailer got away from him - well, it didn't exactly 'get away from him' - it took him with it! I said the most stupid thing I've ever said in my life - "Don't move, Mort, help is on the way!" Well, he was pinned underneath the trailer - I don't know exactly where I thought he was going to move to! Anyway, he didn't want any help! he just wanted that thing moved! He was a very brave guy - to say nothing about his sense of humor. He's been missed ever since you guys moved away - he always waved to me whenever he went past and I was out in the yard.

Saturday, June 23, 2007

Who out there in Germany knows Dad?

Hi there - write to me if you're the reader from Germany!

thanks!

susie@scrollbar.com

Friday, June 22, 2007

From Karina, for her Grandpa




Our Love For Grandpa

Dear Jesus,

I hope you take good care of Grandpa like he took care of us. Jesus please let him be happy in Heaven. We thank you for giving him an opportunity to live on earth and have a good home and be a good husband, father, brother, uncle and a grandpa. We thank you for letting us have him.

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Our Business in Seaside on Monday



We brought Dad's ashes down to Seaside on Monday, and it was so wonderful to be so warmly received by friends of mom and dad. Mom's friend Patsy had arranged for a reception at the Elks club, and the room was filled with a lot of close friends who remembered Dad fondly and wanted to make note of his passing. They had a lunch spread set out for us, and someone gave Mom the most aromatic yellow rose any of us had ever seen. It was all very sweet, and it was so wonderful to see Mom surrounded by old friends who love her. Mom is looking forward to heading down to Seaside again soon to reconnect with everyone she saw on Monday.

It was a beautiful day at the beach, and everything went just right. Like mom was saying, there just hasn't been anything "wrong" with Dad's passing and working through his final arrangements. From the party on Saturday (separate post to come on that, with pictures!) to scattering his ashes at the beach, it has all gone so beautifully. Well, I can think of one thing. Jocelyn and Brooke determined that the Razor Clams they ordered in honor of Daddy at Doogers in Seaside were a tad over breaded. But, otherwise... perfect.







p.s. this is one of my all time favorite pictures of Mom. Love you Momma!

Memorial Tattoos!

Marcia, Jocelyn, Brooke and I got memorial tattoos in honor of daddy last week.



This is the one Jocelyn and Marcia got, close up. I love how the heart is plump and juicy.



Here's a close up of mine - Brooke's is very similar to mine, although hers says "G-Pa" rather than "Dad", and her letters are on the outside of the heart, rather than the inside.




Here we are waiting for our turn at the tattoo parlor.



(I am posting this picture of me to prove I have no vanity.)


And here's Brooke, and then me, actually getting the ink.





Here's to ya, Daddy!


- Susie

Sunday, June 17, 2007

A note from Frank (father in law of Susie)



I have a lot of great memories of Mort, but one of my favorites was an incident at your wedding in Hawaii. Mort and I were tasked with bringing stuff from the condo up to Princeville where the wedding and reception were taking place.We got to Princeville (about a 40 minute drive from the condo) only to find we'd forgotten something. I can't even remember what it was, but it was important enough that we had to high-tail it back, pick it up, and get back in time for the ceremony.When we arrived back at the condo (which was on the second floor), we found that the front door was locked and we didn't have a key.

We went into an open condo next door, went out on the balcony, and leaned over and looked around the wall at the balcony and back door of the unit that was locked to see if we could see anyone. All we saw was the back sliding door and we wondered out loud whether it was locked or not.

I started to problem solve the situation and mentioned something about seeing if the front office had a key or a ladder when your dad grabbed the rail and a drain pipe and launched himself over the rail, around the separating wall, and onto that adjoining balcony.

Quite a feat with a cement pool deck below!

I suspect you'd say that was just like him.

I think he was the inspiration for the Nike slogan,
"Just Do It!".

- Frank

PS: The rear slider was open and we made it back in time to see you guys get hitched......

The Life and Times of O.D. "Mort" Mortland


Orville David Mortland was born on December 7, 1928 to John (“Burt”) and Jessie (Taylor) Mortland. He joined older brother John and sister Margaret on the family’s farm at the top of Cavalero Hill in Everett, WA. Burt worked for the Roads department for the town of Everett, and he and Jessie grew raspberries, corn and Jessie’s prized dahlias.

Orv was a quick learner and graduated a year and a half ahead of schedule, with the class of “1944 and ½” After high school, Dad went to work, taking jobs at Woolworths, a local real estate company and Pacific Car and Foundry. Orv even gave Boeing a chance at his mad skills, but quit after one day because the work just wasn’t interesting enough!



While working at Castle Industries, an airplane parts manufacturer, Orv met his future wife on a blind date at a Halloween Party in 1954. Ann was a teacher in the Everett school district and she found herself “not immediately” charmed by Orv’s quick wit and devoted pursuit. The happy couple were engaged by Christmas and married on June 24, 1955.




Ann and Orv began their family right away – some would say that very night! Stephen David was their first child, followed quickly by Diana Beth, Marcia Ann and Jocelyn Ruth.

Stephen David



Dianna Beth


Marcia Ann



Jocelyn Ruth


Suzann Lauren


Suzann Lauren made her way several years later and the Mortlands stopped at five. Ann and Orv say they would’ve stopped after Dian, but as luck would have it (for Marcia, Jocelyn and Susie!) it didn’t quite work out that way. In fact, six weeks after Susie was born, Ann wrapped her in a blanket and brought her along to the official “cutting ceremony” that would cap the Mortland brood at five.

Orv began working at Magna Design, a furniture manufacturer in Lynnwood, Washington and he would ultimately retire from there in the early 1990’s. Dad made many life long friends at Magna Design, and was respected for his devotion to family, his sense of humor and his amazing ability to calculate large sums in his head. (His kids, however, or, specifically, this kid, remember many nights of help with homework that would give one the impression that his mathematical ability was not inherited!)



The Mortlands enjoyed many wonderful travel adventures over the years, something everyone really enjoyed. A quick inquiry of most remembered family vacations include a road trip to California and the Grand Canyon, car trips to Canada, Lopez Island and many others. Mom and Dad instructed us early on the pleasures of a good campfire, and how to make the perfect S’more – followed by Camp Eggs the next morning! They waited until the kids were old enough to be left behind before traveling by airplane to places like Europe, Mexico and Hawaii.



Mom and Dad figured out early it was more fun to throw everyone in a camper and head out for an adventure than pretty much anything else. These trips would be the beginning of a lifelong dream Ann and Orv realized in 2002, that of driving around the country for a year in their own motor home.


Dad always loved to travel, especially if it meant a chance to fish, shop or wander around! All of us kids can clearly remember Dad heading off to wander the streets of some unknown town or tourist site. Hands in pockets, shoulders hunched, a confident and purposeful stride as he headed off to nowhere in particular. He’d return with a copy of the local paper and maybe even a few donuts for those of us left behind. Orv perfected the art of people watching and making friendly conversation with strangers.

When Orv retired from Magna Design, he and Ann relocated down to the Oregon Coast to open a family restaurant, Puffins at Cannon Beach. Managed by their daughter Marcia, Dad was chief dish and bottle washer more times than I think he would care to be remembered for. The restaurant was another grand adventure in their lives and for the several years it was in operation became a favorite of the locals and earned the Mortlands many wonderful friends and loyal customers. It was at this time that Dad became involved in the local order of the Elks in Seaside, and he and Ann did a fair amount of catering work on behalf of the Elks after their restaurant closed in the late 1990’s. They enjoyed their several years on the Oregon Coast, and their kids and grandkids enjoyed a seaside vacation destination that they will always treasure.


Steve and his wife Kathie gave Ann and Orv their first grandchild, Scott was born in the summer of 1981 and Jocelyn gave birth to Brooke later that summer. Alex joined Steve and Kathie and Scott a couple years later, and Dian and her husband Nigel followed a few years after with Christopher and Brandon.




Several years later, Susie and her husband Jeff became parents with the birth of their son Henry, and daughter Margaret came along a few years later. Marcia brought Karina and her mother Marilu into the family fold when Karina was just a baby, and Marilu recently gave birth to baby Isai several weeks before Dad’s passing. Orv was a wonderful Grandfather (or G-Pa, or Grandpa, or Grandpa Orville) and he treasured each grandchild that came along.

When Orv and Ann decided to hit the road and roam the countryside in a motor home, they did so with classic optimism and pluck. It was the perfect time in their lives to take the trip on. The kids were raised and doing fine, busy with families of their own, the business had been sold and they were free of its responsibilities, and Dad had successfully treated his initial bout of colon cancer with two surgeries and a round of chemotherapy. It was now or never.



Closing up the house in Seaside, buying a second hand motor home and then retrofitting it with a number of highly customized Mort-ifications, these two companionable travelers, along with their dog Fritz, hit the road in May of 2002. The plan was to head east from Seaside, stay in campgrounds along the way and just see the sights. If there happened to be a flea market or craft fair or farmers market along the way, so much the better.


Ann, Orv and Fritz stayed on the road for over 11 months. They traveled east across the northern states and Canada to stay for three weeks in late summer to visit Susie and her family in southern New Hampshire.


After a quick road trip down to New York City with Susie, they continued down the eastern seaboard and settled in Florida over the winter. Turning west and wandering through the Gulf Coast and deep south, they came up through Arizona and Utah to return to Seattle a week early so as to surprise Jocelyn at her 40th birthday party.

Mom updated everyone with a wonderful se ries of emails she sent out along the way, and a family friend shipped them their mail once a month. Ann and Orv spent their days driving or resting or plotting the drive to their next stop, seeing the sights or just hanging out at home. The Full-timers culture suited them to a T and they both fully enjoyed every day. Although at one point, just when Mom was convinced she and Dad had said everything there was to say to one another, they invested in Satellite Radio and “saved the marriage!”



The trip had its peaks (Grandson Chris joins them in South Dakota! Parking the ‘home at Curtis Farm in New Hampshire and heading in to NYC with Susie! Hooking up with Dian in Florida!Decorative Doodads to personalize the Motor home! Niagra Falls! New Orleans! The Perfect Tomato!) and valleys (losing the towed-along Honda while making a right hand turn! Expensive Repairs! Unavoidable Delays! Additional Expensive Repairs! More Unavoidable Delays!). But was it worth it? You better believe it. Did Dad ever, in his entire life, even right up to the last few days of his life, announce a single regret about the hassle and chaos involved? Not once.

As their children, we kids were so proud of both Mom and Dad and their perseverance and their love of life that we couldn’t have been happier and more at peace to have them on the road. Having been driven around by Dad for years prior, we all feared somewhat for those folks they’d be sharing the road with. We had all come to terms with the idea that they could very well get themselves hurt, or worse, while out on the road. Their stayed strong throughout the trip and they returned back to us full of life and vitality in April of 2003.



With a new found appreciation for the little things in life, Ann and Orv settled back into life in Seaside, enjoying their home and visiting family once again, shorter trips up to Seattle and becoming involved again in the Seaside community.

Ann and Orv didn’t raise five kids without learning a thing or two about life, and this trip reinforced for Dad the personal code he ultimately lived up to his dying day, which this quote from Morris West sums up perfectly:


One has to abandon altogether the search for security, and reach out to the risk of living with both arms.

One has to embrace the world like a lover.

One has to accept pain as a condition of existence.

One has to court doubt and darkness as the cost of knowing.

One needs a will stubborn in conflict, but apt always to total acceptance of every consequence of living and dying.

- Morris L. West




Soon after returning from their trip, Orv received word that his cancer had returned. Up until the cancer plaguing him in his final years, Mort had always enjoyed excellent health. Oh sure, there were the perfectly explainable mishaps (rolling the Blazer while reaching for an elusive Butterfinger in the glove box, or attempting to single handedly relocate a boat and trailer with his bare hands – see “Rolling Boat Trailer Drags Man 80 Feet”, Seaside Signal, 1997) and the same standard coughs and colds suffered by every other red blooded American, but overall, his health was excellent, his body a machine.

There are two gifts Mom and Dad gave us kids: a great marriage to grow up safe inside of, and a robust immune system. We could certainly name several dozen more, but those are two of the secrets to happiness we Mortland children enjoyed. Safe harbor and good health.

Over the years, if any of us kids had a friend who needed or felt comforted by Ann and Orv’s special brand of parenting – that elusive mix of support and independence, acerbic wit and unconditional acceptance, why, they were more than welcome to join in the fun. Is it possible that we kids could all name a friend or two of ours that was welcomed into the fold over the lifetime of our family? Are there even some of those lucky ducks reading these words right now?

Diving in to another round of chemo with the classic Mortland optimism, Ann and Orv celebrated Dad’s first day of treatment by adopting a little black dog they named Kimo. Mort continued to receive treatment in Seaside, but they gradually began to realize that they would rather be surrounded by family full time and so the brainstorming began for another of life’s elegant solutions.







In June of 2005, Ann and Orv celebrated their fiftieth wedding anniversary and their family threw them a big party at their home. It was a beautiful day, and many friends and family came to congratulate them on having made it so far in life. Fifty years is a long time, especially when you throw in eleven months crammed together inside a motorized isolation chamber towards the end of it! But whatever Ann and Orv did, it worked. They made a great team, and it was with a lot of pride and joy that their friends and family helped to celebrate that wonderful day.



Later in the summer of 2005, Ann and Orv made the move back up to Seattle. The house sold, the apartment in Seattle was secured, the garage sales were had, and the move was made. Both Mom and Dad were so happy to be back in the city, the first few months were great fun for them. Lots of rides downtown on the bus, searching out delicious Chinese food, and hooking up with various family members for casual adventures. Several trips to Costco, Muckleshoot Casino, Diamond Lil’s for their $5 dollar dinner deals, and of course the giant Goodwill down on Dearborn. They loved their apartment, the location was perfect, and the relaxed good times of being around their kids full time again was heaven for both of them.

Orv continued to be a voracious reader all through his life, and right up until the end, he was always in the middle of a good book or two. If there were words, Dad would read them. If you went to his home, you knew where Dad sat because there would be a newspaper tossed over the back of the couch, a book open and temporarily set aside, and two or three magazines awaiting perusal. The TV would usually be on, too.

Growing up, we kids watched Dad’s favorite shows like 60 Minutes, Barney Miller, M*A*S*H, All in the Family, Rosanne, and in his later years, (after we kids grew up and moved out and left Mom to suffer his television habits) The O’Reilly Factor. Dad was a devoted sports fan and he watched nearly every Seahawks game that aired on television. Any sport playing on TV was worth watching as far as Dad was concerned – boxing, curling, golf, football, you name it. One daughter remembers being called away from her piano lesson in the other room to stand by the TV and change the channel for him… perhaps this early version of a remote control was one his cleverest ‘Mortisism’ yet!





Running like a thread through Dad’s whole life, was his love of dogs. Seemed we always had a dog or two growing up, and they were usually Dad’s dogs. A little dog or two seemed to follow him where ever he went. Orv was always up for adding a new pup to the mix if the timing seemed right. One time, Dad and Susie picked Mom up at the airport with a Miniature Schnauzer puppy tucked into a box and placed on her seat! Mom was “not immediately” thrilled. Or, rather, Mom knew she had married a dog lover.

It was in November of 2005 that we found out that Dad’s cancer had returned and spread. Our precious father was entrusted to the wonderful care of a leading Swedish Cancer Center oncologist named Dr. Mehmet Fer. Dr. Fer arranged for another round of chemotherapy, this treatment cycle designed mostly to stall cancer growth. The cancer had returned, and it wasn’t leaving, but the chemo Dad endured gave him time, nearly all of 2006 before things took their turns and brought us to where we are today.

I won’t go into details here, but 2007 was a real fight for Dad. Chemo treatment ended for good in November, and Orv enjoyed a brief interlude over the holidays before a neurological problem began to plague him relentlessly. The available treatments were given to Dad, with some success, but in the end it was being able to come to Jocelyn’s house and receive around the clock care from his family that brought him the most peace.

Dad was at Jocelyn’s for the last few weeks of his life. His family gathered around him and cared for him full time, and it was there that Dad began to do the difficult work ahead of him. He had his dogs by his side, his wife and kids, his nieces Annette and Carol coming by nearly every day, and assorted adopted Mortlands coming in to visit. It was a wonderful, magical time for all of us.

Dad had always loved a good party, and even in the last days of his life, his wonderful spirit permeated the house. It was a sad time, to be sure, but also one full of laughter and casual conversation and spirited debate. Just what Dad would’ve wanted. Whether it was sitting in his room and talking quietly with him or others come to visit, or elsewhere in the house, Dad could hear our laughter and the comfort we found in each others company. Which is exactly what being a Mortland is all about.

So thanks Dad. Thanks for everything. You embraced the world like a lover. You accepted pain as a condition of existence, and you courted doubt and darkness as the cost of knowing. You possessed a will stubborn in conflict, but you were apt always to total acceptance of every consequence of living and dying. And best of all, you passed it on.





We love you and we miss you. Happy Fathers Day.

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Things that I am Thankful for......

1)…..That I met and had the sense to marry Orv Mortland. The marriage lasted for nearly 52 years and, while there were ups and downs, it was a happy one with lots of love and respect. This was miraculous since most of our families gave it only 6 months. Guess we showed them, huh?!
2)….That he gave me five beautiful, fantastic and loving children. They are an ideal mix of both of us and they seemed to acquire all of our “good” genes.. Since we had only planned to have two, I am glad that plan fell through - big time.
3)…..That he encouraged my involvement in Sweet Adelines. If he had known how involved I would have actually been, I wonder if he would have changed his mind about that. He recognized the personal growth the organization afforded me. He never said “no” to anything and rooted me on whenever I decided to tackle something new. He never complained to me about being stuck with the kids while I was away…..though little birds hinted that it got to him sometimes.. He was truly the “wind beneath my wings”!
4)…..That he loved to travel and wasn’t afraid to enter unknown areas wherever we went….That sometimes made me nervous but still it was fun to watch the prostitutes in Frankfurt Germany as well as Vancouver, B.C.. When we would go to Mexico he always wandered up the side streets which were a bit dicey. He loved the numerous camping trips which climaxed in the BIG trip around the U.S. in our motor home. That was a trip of a lifetime and we both treasured it.
5)……That he taught me to love dogs…I had never grown up with dogs because my mother was allergic to them. Just before we got married we acquired the first of the many we would have. It was a pure bred beagle that we name Rimo……for Riches and Mortland. We ended up with Fritz and Kimo. Fritz went on the trip with us and we got Kimo the day Orv started his first chemo sessions. He loved those dogs deeply and would call for them constantly when he was in the hospital. You can read about “nurse Fritz” further on down this blog.
6)……That he showed me how to become interested in the world around me…particularly politically. He was a true conservative and would yell back at the TV when something upset him. He only tolerated liberalism when those espousing it were people he loved deeply. He watched Bill O’Reilly faithfully every night at 5 O’clock. He was having a lot of trouble with recent events, however, and actually ventured into thinking he might not vote a strict Republican ticket the next time around
7)…..That he instilled in me a love of reading…He would read everything from books to cereal boxes and we were able to pass that love down to our children.
I am going to stop at 7 because that was our “lucky number” ( we were both born on the 7th) I will always hold dear the memory of his love and respect right up to the end. How lucky can one woman be to know that she was loved so deeply? Goodbye, dear friend and husband….it was a great ride…..thank you so much for everything.
Ann

Thursday, June 14, 2007

A Personal Heaven

I believe in heaven, not the traditional heaven of most I’m sure but a personal heaven. I’d like to think Dad is in ‘his’ heaven right now, flashing his ‘perma-grin’ and enjoying all the things he loved so much.

I’m pretty sure there is a line-up for this heaven, a time to reflect and remember, just to ensure all your wishes are available. Dad did a lot of reflecting during his final days, all a part of his journey to where he is today.

It’s kind of funny to think that Dad was in line with an elephant. Yes, an elephant (Hansa) at our local zoo passed away the same day as Dad. I’m sure he had to enter through a larger gate than Dad but, if you count the size of someone’s heart, Dad followed Hansa through the same gate, smiling all the way!

If you knew my Dad you know he loved his family most of all. Nothing pleased him more than when we were all together. It gave him such pleasure to see us laughing and enjoying each other as friends. Like the old saying goes…. “You can’t pick your relatives but you CAN pick your friends”. We were lucky to have both, and that’s a testament to my parents who showed us how to be family. We weren’t always conventional but we were loved and for that I’ll be forever grateful.

So, back to “Dad’s Heaven”…… He talked of seeing lots of water and lakes before he died so I’d like to think he’s surrounded by those. A small fishing boat perhaps, eagles flying overhead and lots of fish and other sea creatures to catch and enjoy. Corn on the cob (make sure it’s not too ripe), artichokes, “horses-ovaries”, butterfingers and peanut brittle, as well as a never ending bottle of whiskey (doesn’t need to be expensive) and some cold beer. There’s a card game every night (never no-peek), the Super Bowl plays every Sunday and his team (the ’86 Seahawks with Dave Kreig as quarterback) always wins. There is always a roll of duct tape nearby for quick repairs, as well as WD-40, wire ties and bungee cords. There is no welfare system, no war, no taxes funding programs he doesn’t support, and no local government telling him how to live his life. Cars don’t dent, they just bruise and then heal up, and every dog has his day.

Dad was never going to die, he was going to live forever and he always will in our hearts. Caring for Dad in his last days was a privilege I’ll never forget. To be with him as he finally acknowledged he WAS going to die was so special. Then to watch him do it with dignity and unconditional love for his family, with smiling eyes, laughter and an understanding and peace about what was to come only made me love and respect him even more. I didn’t think that was possible…

A special thanks to all that supported us, and Dad, during his final days. Too many people to mention by name but.... a special shout out to my cousins Carol & Annette, Sherrie, Dr. Fer and everyone at Swedish Hospice. Jocelyn & Brooke, thanks for opening up your home and giving all of us a place to gather & support Dad through his final days. To know he was ‘home’ meant so much to all of us, you gave him that final gift and for that I’ll be forever grateful. I love you Mom, Marcia, Susie, Steve… Nigel, Chris & Brandon thanks to you for supporting me during this time. I love you all so much.

Thanks most of all to my Daddy-O….. For showing me that even though life has to end some day, it won’t be scary or something to dread. It’s a beautiful process and one I look forward to (in about 50 years ) especially because I know I’ll see you again.

Love You,
Dian

A note from Eileen Hall in Seaside


I've many memories of the good things Mort did for us and me especially. One really stands out: Ken was out of town and I had smoke curling out of our electrical fuse box. Mort to the rescue with a quick fix of the electrical problem AND of my apprehension! With love and prayers....Eileen

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

A note from Nigel's Mum in England


Hi Susie, this is Anne (Nigel’s Mum) in England. What a beautiful tribute to Mort.

David and I will always remember the welcome we had from Mort and Anne whenever we visited Seattle, and the day we spent with them when they showed us around the Seaside area one Sunday is one of our favourite memories of America.

I have written below a little tribute about dogs which I came across and think Fritz (the wonderful companion for Mort), just fits this admirably – man’s best friend eh?

“I talk to him when I’m lonesome like,
And I’m sure he understands,
When he looks at me so attentively,
And gently licks my hands;
Then he rubs his nose on my tailored clothes,
But I never say naught thereat,
For the good Lord knows I can buy more clothes,
But never a friend like that!”
-W. Dayton Wedgefarth


Although we can’t be there on Saturday, you will all be in our thoughts – especially Mort,

God Bless
Anne

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Pool Halls in Heaven, BEWARE!

Pool halls in heaven beware, there is a new player in town, so grab your wallets!

My father passed away last Friday, at 11:48 am, and it was a beautiful thing. My parents mortality has always been my biggest fear. They mean so damn much to me, and I always thought I should go before they did. Dad's ordeal really opened my eyes, and had it not been for my sisters and mom, what I had feared became the most amazing experience of my life.

I always maintained that I had two heros in life. They were people who really shaped my interests. But, now I have many new heroes. Let's start with my sisters. Dian, Jocelyn, Marcia and Susie were by my dad's side constantly during his last two weeks. They exhibited more strength than I ever could muster. They would rub dad's feet and hands, clean him, talk to him, scold him for not eating, in essence making his last days on this earth as quality filled as anyone could imagine. Jocelyn opened up her home, not only for Dad's last days, but anyone who wanted to enter, whether to see Dad, or just to hang out. All four of them made themselves available at all times, kept up on his medication, questioned doctors orders that didn't feel right, the list goes on and on.

When Dad was "in the prison", meaning the adult care home near Jocelyns house in Renton, they were there daily, sacrificing family time, because they all knew what they were doing was absolutely the right thing. Their support of my feelings and commitments during this time will never be forgotten.

When we went through this a little over a year ago, due to issues at the job I had at the time, and my fears of my fathers demise, I took the path of least resistance, and withdrew from the reality. They understood that this wasn't an easy thing for me to go through, we all talked about it, and I resolved that it was going to be different the next time around. I hope that I met with their approval.

Mom was her strong self as well, visiting with Dad every day, making sure that he knew that he was loved, not only by her, but by Fritz and Kimo as well. Seeing Fritz and Kimo not leaving Dad's bed until the very end was one of the coolest parts of the process.

My neice Brooke falls into the hero category as well. She, along with my sisters, put her life on hold for the duration, to make sure her Grandpa's last days were filled with love and care. She would bring humor into the room, and I know that Dad loved her very very much. Her support of Jocelyn and my sisters was at the very least impressive.

To the "adopted" family members, Sherrie, Marilu and Karina, Katie, and my cousins Carol and Annette, thank you for joining us. I'm sure there are many more that need to be included here, and I apologize for not naming you. Our family, and my parents in particular, always welcome our friends into the family, and once you're in, it's a bitch to get out!

It was my wish not to be in Dad's room when he took his last breath. Both Marcia and I felt the same way, and all involved respected our wishes. My brother in law Nigel called me at work right after he died, and told me it was over. I got down to Jocelyns house as soon as I could, and Mom asked if I wanted to see him. I struggled on the way down to Renton as to how I was going to handle this whole deal. I did want to see him, and it was unreal. To use a tired cliche, he looked like he was asleep.

My sisters had made sure that he was dressed, as his dignity had suffered enough, and they wanted to go out with as much diginity as they could. For that, I will be forever grateful. I spent some time with him, thanking him for all he had done for me and my family, and told him to have a great time in the next chapter. He was an amazing father, friend, and supporter. When it came time for him to be taken away, I was honored to be the one who stood by mom's side, listening to Fritz growl as the people from the mortuary took him away. I held the door open to the van, said goodbye, and away he went. An incredible experience, to say the least.

I highly encourage you to read my sister Susie's blog, which can be found at this address http://slk-susiesblog.blogspot.com/index.html/ She is a great writer, and her blogs should be required reading.

Thanks to all who were aware of my father's situation. We will be having a party in his honor at 2pm this Saturday, June 16 at Jocelyns house, and we'll send him out with a bang.

- Steve Mortland

Sunday, June 10, 2007

Nurse Fritz

The story of Fritz and his devotion to my dad in his final weeks was just incredible. As soon as we got Dad settled at Jocelyn's, Fritz would lay on his bed all day and all night. The only times he'd get off the bed would be to go outside or to sit with my mom while she was visiting. After Dad had been here a week or so, I decided to shave off all of Fritz's hair as the sheer fluffyness of him was too much. He had mats and was shedding and it got to be like an unconsious addiction to gently work free big puffy balls of hair. And he was constantly panting and huffing and puffing. Gross.


So I cut his hair as short as possible, and I did a pretty good job of it, too! His face isn't as perfectly round as it could be, but like I told mom, she paid a fair price for a haircut like that! As soon as he was all finished with his grooming, he was so much more comfortable and cuddly, you could just tell he was thrilled with the results.


We were so curious about whether dad would notice the difference but he didn't at first. A few days later Dad was talking with us about our plans for his memorial and he said all of a sudden, clear as a bell, "Fritz... you look like a rabbit!" He seemed to enjoy the smoother version of his formerly fluffed out Pom.

Thruout the day Fritz would hop up on Dad's bed and circle and nest in a cozy spot between dad's legs. Then he'd sleep there or sit and watch whatever was going on. If we had to care for dad in some physical way, we always had to toss fritz out into the hallway and then listen to him scratching at the door to be let back in. he didn't like being kicked out, but if we didn't he'd make a growling fuss, refusing to get off the bed, making it sort of tricky to do whatever needing doing. it was very sweet.

The weather moved from hot and sunny to overcast and chilly and at some point Fritz began wearing a little green sweater. We had been horsing around a little bit and had outfitted him with a toy stethascope. He looked so damn cute.



Fritz stayed with Dad the whole time, and it was so wonderful to have him there. Because of where the bed and chair beside it were set up, when you were sitting with dad, you could also be practically face to face with Fritz. It was such a comfort to be able to turn to Fritz and have them there, ready to lick and greet you. And when you left Dad alone, you were never really leaving him alone because Fritz was in there with him. Towards the end Fritz was nursing all of us through!

We were all in there for Dad's last few seconds of life, and during that time Fritz moved up to Dad's shoulder almost, right over his heart, and stayed there. It was like he followed Dad's life force or something. like his heart was the last little spot of Dad left and Fritz centered his body right over that spot until it was completely over.

Thanks, Fritz. Good Dog.

Welcome!

Hello! This blog has been created in honor of our Dad, Orv Mortland. Like we say, if you knew this guy, you can just go ahead and consider yourself one of the lucky ones. Orv was a prince among men, plain and simple. If he knew he'd made it to cyberspace, with his own blog, he'd be going all "Fiddledeedee!"

We will be having a celebration of Dad's life on Saturday, June 16, 2007. We will be getting started in the mid afternoon, and more details will be forthcoming. Thanks for checking back soon and for caring about Orv enough to climb online and check us out. I hope to have a bunch of different posts here, maybe some stories, a biography, certainly pictures and a little something we call Mortisisms. Oddball things that dad would say or do, or handy little DIY fixits that he came up with. If you have something you'd like to submit, just leave a comment!

Saturday, June 9, 2007

Orville D. Mortland

This wonderful man was born on December 7, 1928 in Everett and died peacefully at home on June 8, 2007. Orv lived a full and meaningful life, and if you knew him you were lucky beyond measure. For online obituary and memorial information visit www.odmortland.blogspot.com.